Monthly Archives: July 2009

Midlife Transition is Learning to Live in the Flow

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Water is the perfect non-resistant element.

We can see where it has worn away even the hardest rock. You can go to the Grand Canyon and be stunned and amazed by the power of non-resistance over time.

We have also seen water sweep everything before it in torrential outburst, bridges, buildings, trees; nothing can withstand its force.

Yet, note how the great river begins. It starts as a little stream high up in the mountains, and it’s usually very crooked in the beginning.

The little stream just runs over the boulders or the fallen tree, it doesn’t stop and wait for its energy or its force to build up so it can push the obstacle out of its path. It’s not interested so much in the boulder or the tree as it is about creating or getting where its current pulls it.

You and I can use this to understand how we can be non-resistant. Flow is one of the great Laws of Life.

To Your Ease and Grace,
Mary Morrissey

Thoughts on Forgiveness by Noel McGinness – International Forgiveness Week

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Please do not believe me

if ever I should say that you’ve upset me.

Sometimes I forget the true source of my feelings.

You cannot make me sad,

impatient,

angry,

or otherwise dis-eased.

Only a hope or expectation of you on my part,

which you have not fulfilled,

can move me thus.

Yet I am too human

to be without hopes and expectations,

and I am also much too human

to live always in the knowing

that my hopes and expectations

have no claim upon your being.

So if I say that you’ve upset me,

please forgive me for attempting

to disinherit my own self’s creation of my pain.

And please do not ignore my deeper message:

I care enough about you

to include you in my hopes and expectations. ~Noel McInnis

Transforming a Misperception

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July 24, 2009

We all know what it feels like to want something we don’t have. It may be a pair of expensive jeans, a romantic partner, or rent money; it may be a certain attitude, a car, or a savings account. This is part of life, and in the best-case scenario, we experience a constant flow of money and material possessions, companions and experiences, in and out of our lives. However, many of us linger in a state of wanting and not having, a state of lack that never seems to subside. We consistently perceive ourselves as not having what we need or not having what we want. This is an energetically draining state to be in. It is also self-perpetuating because how we feel about ourselves determines what we are able to create for ourselves.

How we feel profoundly influences how we perceive our reality. When we feel we are lacking, we look around and see what is not there. On the other hand, if we feel abundant, we can look at the very same situation and see a completely different picture, one full of blessings and advantages. The more we see the blessings, the more abundant we feel, and the more blessings we attract. Similarly, if we see lack, we tend to create and attract that energy.

If you find yourself habitually residing in a feeling of lack, it may be due to a core belief formed in your childhood or even in a past life. It may be because you are out of touch with your inner divinity, which is the source of your abundance. In any case, know that your perception of lack is a misperception that can be corrected with awareness and effort. It can be as simple as taking 10 or 15 minutes each day to quiet your mind and imagine yourself in a state of unlimited abundance, handling the financial demands and others in your life with total ease, drawing from an endless supply of resources. Know that it is your birthright to be fully supported in the fulfillment of your needs and desires.

Baby Boomers in Midlife Transition – How do You Handle Challenges?

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How do you handle Challenges?
If you’re like most people I know, you face them
squarely, and Do whatever it takes to handle them.
You take action even if you aren’t sure what to do.
That’s who you are. At least a large part of you.

But what about that part that isn’t sure? You know, the one that says you aren’t enough, or you don’t really have what it takes, or you’re never going to get it all right.

I applaud you for being one who tackles challenges by doing, but
for now, I want to talk with the part of you, who like me, aches and longs for even more….
We long for a real clarity about our lives and our mission.
We long for the feeling of full satisfaction that our talents are being fully expressed and fully accepted. We long to take more action on the things we know are important in our lives, but we just can’t seem to get ourselves to do them… You know what they are….I sure know what mine are…

If you are like me, (and if you are on this list, you
probably are at least in part!) – you know
that something in you is putting up a barrier.

But, what is it? WHAT IS IT?

…….I’m about to tell you – but first,
I want to introduce you to two dear, dear friends
and colleagues – Judith and Jim – both psychotherapists
and best selling authors as well as leaders of what is coming to
be known as Heart Based Marketing. These two are the real deal.
I know. They’ve helped me more than perhaps they even know.
And, now, I want to share their gift with all of you.

We’re in the middle of The Midlife Makeover and I know that
some of you were finding it a challenge to come to ALL the sessions.
I hadn’t intended to do this – -but, because
THIS session is so important, I want to give ALL of you
the opportunity to attend. In fact, I even want you to have
the recording so you can get the most from it…

http://www.tinyurl.com/JulyJJ09

The call is all about what Judith and Jim have come to label:
The Fear of Being Fabulous™

And there’s not one person alive on this planet who’s not
been held back by it.

If you are still reading, you were drawn to this very experience .

It’s time to overcome your fear of being fabulous
and live the life you know is there deep inside.

IT”S TIME NOW…
. Not next week. Not next month. Not tomorrow . . .

NOW…. Give yourself this gift of true Freedom.
You’ll thank you, I know you will.

http://www.tinyurl.com/JulyJJ09

Are you longing to be fully free?
IT’S YOUR TIME NOW!

http://www.tinyurl.com/JulyJJ09

I’m ready to live more fully – JOIN ME!
Dr. Toni

Asking -Is that all there is – in Midlife?

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I am about to reveal an incredible secret about your dreams that is so unexpected, so astounding that I am confident you have never heard about it before. Read it, absorb it, use it, and soon you’ll be on the road to a new kind of fortune few will ever know.

Make your deepest wish come true
Meet each morning with bright anticipation
Step into the refreshing flow of real life
Even though this revelation may seem strange and unsettling at first, just keep reading because you will soon discover its amazing power. It can shake up your life — for the better! — forever. Here it is:

Your present dreams about where to find happiness and fulfillment are the very things that stand between you and the real happiness and fulfillment you seek.

They act as a barrier to a special creative power that can pour itself into you right now and make the deepest wishes of your heart come true.
Now keep going, because this next point is more shocking still:

The dreams you presently have are not even yours!

They are leftover mind patterns created by encounters you’ve had in the past with parents, teachers, movies, books, and magazines. They are not alive. They are recycled. And that’s why, even if you manage to fulfill them, they don’t fully satisfy.

We all instinctively know that this is true. Have you ever realized one of your dreams only to find yourself with an unexpected feeling of emptiness? Or, maybe you ran across the “finish line” of some newly achieved goal, only to hear the “starting gun” go off again? Of course you have — we all have. But, haven’t you ever wondered…

“Why do most dreams end in the same way? What vital message am I missing?” Here’s the secret answer:

There is a completely different kind of “dream” that lives in the deepest part of all of us, one whose quiet longing, once answered, has the power to completely change your life. And once we finally “get it”… once we realize that the freedom and fulfillment our heart longs for is something we want now — not later — we have completed the first leg of the “hero’s journey.” We are ready to make our real dream a reality!

We have left behind us the ever-retreating world of “a contentment to come” and stand prepared to enter into conscious relationship with success itself: Life’s endless stream of new creative energy.

It’s a fact that Life’s creativity is endlessly refreshed. Each and every creature is a unique expression of an intelligence that never ceases to renew itself. Look closely at a stand of white Aspen trees, or the small group of Gold Finches flitting about in their branches; it’s clear that no two creations are exactly alike. And it’s for a similar reason that we love hearing the rain fall, or watching the waters of a rushing river: second to second their ceaseless newness stirs within us the same feeling.

However, when we look at the lives of most human beings, we don’t find this same sense of newness refreshing itself. Instead, we see weary people being dragged down by mind-numbing routine, old patterns, and recurring problems.

Why? What blocks us from knowing, directly, this vital newness that’s all around us, but that sleeps within us? How can we share in these vibrant forces that are the foundation of creativity itself? What must we do to stop dreaming our life away, and begin really living it?
by Guy Finley

Go to the left hand column and click on the Green book — What You REALLY Want, Wants You. You may find that you already have all you REALLY want.

Importance of Friendship in Midlife

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You’ve gotten pretty good at going to the gym — you also keep the diet reasonable and quit smoking years ago. And you worry about the diseases that have shown up in your family, particularly if there is heart disease or cancer. Or you feel pretty good if your ancestry is filled with people who have lived to 90 years old or beyond. And then of course there is the proverbial bus that we need to dodge each day. All of the exercise and good genes in the world won’t stop the laws of physics should we violate them. So you wear your seat belts when driving and a helmet when riding a bike to provide as much protection as possible against simple bad luck. But here is a whole new area of information for you to consider when it comes to living healthy and living long. First, we want you to answer these two questions:

1. How many friends/relatives do you have who you could ask for help were you to need it? ____

2. How happy are you with the amount of emotional support your friends and relatives give to you? Not at all ___ Somewhat ___ Extremely ___

Before you think we have switched topics on you midstream consider these facts. People who have larger and more satisfying social networks live longer, they get Alzheimer’s disease less, they can handle stress more effectively, and they are less prone to such disorders of aging as hypertension and diabetes. Further, if you are a married man or woman you are likely to live longer than similar people who are unmarried. Numerous mechanisms have been suggested as the reason why social ties improve health and longevity. The most credible reasons are linked to the findings that relationships improve our ability to handle stress. Non-supportive social interactions actually lower our immune function and cause an increase in glucocorticoids, the stress hormones produced by the brain. Cardiovascular activity also is increased by negative social engagements. And you thought it was all in your head when you felt terrible after meeting with a hypercritical relative or even with a boss who is much better at identifying faults than strengths.

The truth is that such interactions do bad things to your body — both on the short- and long-term. However, supportive social interactions result in the exact opposite effects on your body. Such interactions leave your body tuned to handle whatever may come your way. These findings may well fall into the category an old professor of mine would call the “blooming obvious.” Of course we know we feel better after we spend time with friends, when we take the time to develop friendships, when our friends and family go out of their way to support us, and when the people who are most important to us allow us into their lives. It’s all nature’s way. But how many of us really take the time to develop friendships and to nurture the friendships we have? Our point to you is that if there ever was a time to start making a concerted effort to develop more friendships and to have fun with those friends, now is the time.

Many of you may be wondering how many friends you need to have. The short answer appears to be the more the better. It certainly is the case that supportive relationships are better for your health than conflicted relationships. So no matter how many friends you have, or how positive you feel about your friends and family, pull out your calendar right now and schedule at least one more time to be with friends or family for each of the next four weeks. And if you are one of those persons who has gotten into a lifestyle where it is work, work, work; where life is spent on the freeway or at your office; where you can’t really remember the last time you took some time to just be with a friend or a loved one, take this as a life-changing opportunity.